maybe I'm on an up swing...the japan stuff went better than expected today, that's a relief. I have been reading and re reading this book on the best Buddhist writings of 2008 and it makes me try and change from the inside which is what it's all about. Reading that what ever pain I'm in is something I caused someone some other time, not in a guilty way, but in a way that says, experience this pain and act carefully not to create it for someone else. Also a lot about craving and grasping, holding on to what isn't there, and I have been trying to experience my thoughts more carefully, meditatively, and seeing how far ahead I am and how that prevents me from being here now...and being anywhere I am really. Also forgiveness, forgiving myself for the pain I have caused my self and others, and isolating the actions of others that I should forgive. I think there is a lot there about the x, forgiving myself for how it was, forgiving myself.forgiving myself. It seems like that is along way off, but rings very true. I do feel like I love myself for the first time in my life, when all the other confusion or pain is on my mind that is a great surprise, a feeling I didn't know before. So not to get all metaphysical, but going back to the simple stuff I know works and is true is a benefit to the experiences I've had over the last few weeks. Beach with kids, books, Buddha, clearing my head, hanging out w Keith, sleeping with Bella when she was sick. Little bits of magic.
im'd with scg for a while this morning (he found me). Daughter is fine, but they are all a bit shaken up still. Tried to be big about it, glad he was able to get the call in time to go to her, vs. when he landed. That is all true. He apologized and we talked a little about why Tets was mad at me, and just chat. Going to remember that IM isn't real communication, and told him my lesson was not to make plans...sometimes things have to happen because they are supposed to not because you make them happen. Working hard to see that going over and over all of it is not helping me experience anything new.
Showing posts with label japan. Show all posts
Showing posts with label japan. Show all posts
Tuesday, October 14, 2008
Friday, August 22, 2008
Updates!
I just got up from a nap...the consequences of getting up at 430 after going to bed after 12. It's really lucky the schedules flexible this trip. We are going to see our candidate again tomorrow and then finally get Keith. I haven't talked to him in going on 3 days which is hard. Last night back to our bar, but present was one of our least favorite singers. A girl who is good, but just not the same soul as the rest, and she seems to be doing it for attention vs. love of the game, especially in English, but better in Japanese. Afterwards came back to the room and lots of lovely emails with super cute guy. Initiated by him asking how my meetings went. I had sent him the link to the video from the night before and he commented on Bella, I didn't know how he saw her, but there's another public photo album with pics of here. sweet about me, my eyes, smile etc. You can just never get enough of that. I said I really didn't want him to change jobs, that he and I had stuff to do...he didn't know what I meant so I had to explain further, after I already thought I said too much, but just came out with, we should spend more time together, and get to know each other better. He said we can do that no matter what, which was obviously the right thing to hear. So I'm just trying to be where that is, not 10 steps ahead. I can't believe I am going to be here for 6 more days...I am hoping its not too much time for Keith, that we don't feel over it.
Thursday, August 21, 2008
Funniest Thing Ever
My friend (and former work husband) was speculating on what my "off the record" meeting with the womanizer of PFU Japan will be like and wrote the funniest most on the money short story/email to capture what he thinks could happen...copied here:
Part I
They met at the fixed time. On a miniature bridge in a giant city. There was love seat for two nearby. It was a striking monument of the quiet wisdom that emanated from a silent man with much to say.
He seated himself at a respectable distance and cleared his throat.
“Why, he’s nervous, just like me,” she thought. She was happy that he was not like the other salarymen in Tokyo. Those who followed the rules and bowed on command.
“Kon bon wa,” he croaked. His voice was raspy. “Doesn’t matter,” she told herself.
“Kon bon wa!” she crooned.
His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down. She looked even more beautiful today. Her eyes were like those of a deer. And she had such long eyelashes. When she lowered them, they cast mysterious shadows on her cheeks.
Her nose was delicate and straight. Her lips were perfectly shaped; her mouth, a little wide. Her jet black hair shone with a gleam as she moved her head. Her skin had a healthy glow to it. He observed all this while she made a pretext of playing with the edges of her 3G capable Blackberry.
“Well, er… do you like me?” he asked.
She looked at him. His hair was combed to perfection with a perfectly respectable side parting. His nose was aquiline. His eyes were two expressive pools of black. Funny, she’d not noticed that they had so much character in them. His appointment book was neatly tucked into his breast pocket. His mouth … She hastily averted her gaze.
“You know I do!”
“When I saw you on the first day of JIMA, I fell for you. You seemed to mesmerize me by the way you smiled and spoke.”
She remembered. That was three years ago. She had asked him for directions to the one ATM in the city that works. During this period, they had not exchanged more than a few words. But whenever they chanced upon each other: at the AIIM shows, in the demos, in the corridors with no pictures or color … they exchanged silent unspoken messages. Clearly they were attracted to each other.
“Even I felt the same. I was instantly pulled towards you,” she blushed as she spoke. “Every night, I would think of you, wondering whether you would speak with me the next day,” she smiled at the memory.
“And when you did not attend the ARMA show for one whole year, I felt as if my heart would break,” he said softly.
She knew that he would miss her the most. She had fallen sick and had remembered him in each moment of her weakness.
“And when I recovered, I saw you helping my best friend with his perfect PFU factory walking speed,” she shot him an accusing look…
Part II
…”How could she fall for a man who sweats more than a sumo wrestler on a Friendly airport bus?”, he wondered. “He’s a slight man from Osaka who would throw away everything for round eyes and a white girlfriend.” This International Business Woman deserved more than this, he thought.
He summoned the courage to speak to her again, thankfully his English was always better when he was horny. He smoothed the soft fabric of his blazer to mentally prepare himself for the battle ahead. His mind wandered, “…I’ve worn this blazer every day of my life and I’ve never been able to decide if it is green or blue..” It was time to make his move. He floated towards her with the grace and speed of a Shinkansen. Nothing could stop him now…
She watched tremulously as he approached her. He took her hand in his as they sauntered over to the bar. “Irashimashe!” the bartender blurted, she felt both proud of herself and guilty for ignoring him for just enough time to draw the word out in her head in Hiragana. What would you like Ms.? “I’ll take a shot of Jameson, leave the bottle”, and for you sir, “For reraxing times, it’s Suntory time”. It was the corniest and most beautiful moment of the evening.
My only wish is that there are others out there who get how fucking funny and frighteningly accurate this is.
Part I
They met at the fixed time. On a miniature bridge in a giant city. There was love seat for two nearby. It was a striking monument of the quiet wisdom that emanated from a silent man with much to say.
He seated himself at a respectable distance and cleared his throat.
“Why, he’s nervous, just like me,” she thought. She was happy that he was not like the other salarymen in Tokyo. Those who followed the rules and bowed on command.
“Kon bon wa,” he croaked. His voice was raspy. “Doesn’t matter,” she told herself.
“Kon bon wa!” she crooned.
His Adam’s apple bobbed up and down. She looked even more beautiful today. Her eyes were like those of a deer. And she had such long eyelashes. When she lowered them, they cast mysterious shadows on her cheeks.
Her nose was delicate and straight. Her lips were perfectly shaped; her mouth, a little wide. Her jet black hair shone with a gleam as she moved her head. Her skin had a healthy glow to it. He observed all this while she made a pretext of playing with the edges of her 3G capable Blackberry.
“Well, er… do you like me?” he asked.
She looked at him. His hair was combed to perfection with a perfectly respectable side parting. His nose was aquiline. His eyes were two expressive pools of black. Funny, she’d not noticed that they had so much character in them. His appointment book was neatly tucked into his breast pocket. His mouth … She hastily averted her gaze.
“You know I do!”
“When I saw you on the first day of JIMA, I fell for you. You seemed to mesmerize me by the way you smiled and spoke.”
She remembered. That was three years ago. She had asked him for directions to the one ATM in the city that works. During this period, they had not exchanged more than a few words. But whenever they chanced upon each other: at the AIIM shows, in the demos, in the corridors with no pictures or color … they exchanged silent unspoken messages. Clearly they were attracted to each other.
“Even I felt the same. I was instantly pulled towards you,” she blushed as she spoke. “Every night, I would think of you, wondering whether you would speak with me the next day,” she smiled at the memory.
“And when you did not attend the ARMA show for one whole year, I felt as if my heart would break,” he said softly.
She knew that he would miss her the most. She had fallen sick and had remembered him in each moment of her weakness.
“And when I recovered, I saw you helping my best friend with his perfect PFU factory walking speed,” she shot him an accusing look…
Part II
…”How could she fall for a man who sweats more than a sumo wrestler on a Friendly airport bus?”, he wondered. “He’s a slight man from Osaka who would throw away everything for round eyes and a white girlfriend.” This International Business Woman deserved more than this, he thought.
He summoned the courage to speak to her again, thankfully his English was always better when he was horny. He smoothed the soft fabric of his blazer to mentally prepare himself for the battle ahead. His mind wandered, “…I’ve worn this blazer every day of my life and I’ve never been able to decide if it is green or blue..” It was time to make his move. He floated towards her with the grace and speed of a Shinkansen. Nothing could stop him now…
She watched tremulously as he approached her. He took her hand in his as they sauntered over to the bar. “Irashimashe!” the bartender blurted, she felt both proud of herself and guilty for ignoring him for just enough time to draw the word out in her head in Hiragana. What would you like Ms.? “I’ll take a shot of Jameson, leave the bottle”, and for you sir, “For reraxing times, it’s Suntory time”. It was the corniest and most beautiful moment of the evening.
My only wish is that there are others out there who get how fucking funny and frighteningly accurate this is.
A few things....
First, I don't think I have properly documented my love of the Strings Hotel. It's sublime. Arriving is always weird in Japan, too much service for me, don't carry my bags, don't meet me at the bus, just get me my key...and that is the moment the magic happens. The room is simple, average size by US standards, making it large for Tokyo. It's decorated modern but nothing that makes you feel like you're not cool enough for it. So bags down after 18 hours in transit bathroom is #1 priority. The shower/bath combo is engineering perfection, glassed off from toilet and sink, you can use both almost at the same time. Lots of steam, good water pressure, and the water never ever goes outside the shower area, the floor in front of the toilet and sink will never be wet. The washlet is obligatory, and in perfect order. Not too hot, water pressure not too surprising. Everything is provided, tooth brush, toothpaste, hair brush. Hair dryer is to American standards. Robes are great, pajama's are soft, room has it's own iron and ironing board, totally unique for Japan. Bed is huge, bedding simple but right quality. Everything in the mini bar is free....free breakfast, free laundry, free internet, amazing view. I am always happy to arrive.
Next I must document my love of Ramen and my visit to Ramen Town! Working on getting video done and linked.
Next I must document my love of Ramen and my visit to Ramen Town! Working on getting video done and linked.
Wednesday, August 20, 2008
Lots and Lots of Little Stuff
Working here yesterday in the Kofax office was the longest de ja vu ever...it lasted all day. I always imagined doing it, and then it just was happening, not in the super exciting look at my dreams come true way, just strangely in a real time memory. I talked to Keith yesterday, he's bored, I kinda get it, no TV, no easy communication, but day after tomorrow it's on! He said they went to the Hot Springs, I asked him how it was, and he said "There were dicks everywhere" which made me laugh so hard. I am not sure about a visit to the Onsen, but I want to go, so fuck it. Also Ikeda-san's wife's grandmother died, and there is a funeral which in Japan consists of a viewing, a trip to the crematorium as a family watching the body go in to the kiln, then waiting for it to be burned, then back to the kiln to take parts of the remains and put them into an Urn from bottom to top with chopsticks. I guess the clavicle bone goes in last and it looks like a buddah, then they seal the urn. Doood! Heavy shit. Keith was supposed to stay home with the son, but Tets called Ikeda and asked him to take him---not so sure about that, but I am sure not too many westerners see that.
The candidate we interviewed yesterday might be the right one. He is Japanese but born in Belgium!!! Can you believe that? So crazy. He's a little awkward and needy, but that's a good thing when you want someone to work hard. He's regarded as arrogant here which is so strange, last thing I'd use to describe him. They use Agencies here exclusively to hire, so we met with the rep from the Agency, who was from Buhtan, so interesting. I wanted to talk to him forever, I wanted him to take me there immediately. We went to dinner with the Kofax Japan peeps and then took them to Penguin Jacks which is undoubtedly the best bar in the world. Maybe a drank a little much...the soju strategy is good for calories but that shit sneaks up on you. I was feeling a little yucky this AM but it has passed. I did some heavy lifting for work today, so feeling productive, in the room to cool off and so Tets can nap--gotta keep him in good health this trip.
Still emailing with super cute guy which feels sweet. We'll see if it sustains. He's definitely in for the bike ride, so I can look forward to that. I was explaining the Buhtan thing and he had tried to go there, spent a month around everest about 10 years ago...nice surprise. Crazy that he has a brain, kinda artsy, liberal, and works in the same industry. Anyway I don't need to make him any better than he is, that's just leading to the wrong expectations. I sent him a link to a video of last night, we'll see if he watches. He asked me what exactly it is that I do, which made me laugh. Eat, drink, hang out with Tets, site see..you know average work week.
The candidate we interviewed yesterday might be the right one. He is Japanese but born in Belgium!!! Can you believe that? So crazy. He's a little awkward and needy, but that's a good thing when you want someone to work hard. He's regarded as arrogant here which is so strange, last thing I'd use to describe him. They use Agencies here exclusively to hire, so we met with the rep from the Agency, who was from Buhtan, so interesting. I wanted to talk to him forever, I wanted him to take me there immediately. We went to dinner with the Kofax Japan peeps and then took them to Penguin Jacks which is undoubtedly the best bar in the world. Maybe a drank a little much...the soju strategy is good for calories but that shit sneaks up on you. I was feeling a little yucky this AM but it has passed. I did some heavy lifting for work today, so feeling productive, in the room to cool off and so Tets can nap--gotta keep him in good health this trip.
Still emailing with super cute guy which feels sweet. We'll see if it sustains. He's definitely in for the bike ride, so I can look forward to that. I was explaining the Buhtan thing and he had tried to go there, spent a month around everest about 10 years ago...nice surprise. Crazy that he has a brain, kinda artsy, liberal, and works in the same industry. Anyway I don't need to make him any better than he is, that's just leading to the wrong expectations. I sent him a link to a video of last night, we'll see if he watches. He asked me what exactly it is that I do, which made me laugh. Eat, drink, hang out with Tets, site see..you know average work week.
Tuesday, August 19, 2008
This is what tomorrow looks like
I am in Japan, it's almost 7 here, going to hit the gym, then breakfast, then a little work, and I mean very little. I think they are finally going to restore the other blog...but now I'd have to figure out how to migrate, and I kinda like that this one doesn't have all that BS about Tets, which seems lame now.
Anyway I broke the rules and emailed super cute guy and we've been going back and forth for a few hours, just friendly. So I think I have it in perspective. I also have been thinking a lot more about being alone which isn't comfortable but I have to be where I am, so for now that is that.
I really want to talk to Keith. I haven't for 3 days, but I will see him in a few. I know he's fine, but its super weird to think that he's here now, and so am I but we're not together. Lots of fun stuff planned for next week.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)
